After Exams Ramblings!!  

Posted by DJLIM

Woohoo!! Exams are over!! Some picture after the exams.






The Deal With Names.  

Posted by DJLIM

Names are a wonderful thing, its like a unique (well almost unique) tag that we all use from time to time to introduce our selves to other people. However it can be quite funny at times when you live in an Anglo-centric environment such as Australia. Hence from time to time many of your friends and especially my lecturers have a hard time pronouncing my name especially my family Chinese name. Below are the most common or most annoying MIS-pronounced names that I ever heard when people address me in Melbourne.

Lets start of with my sir name LIM
1. Lamb (WTF surely my sir name is not that hard pronounce)
2. Lee (kinda acceptable but still....)
3. Mil (I still have no idea why some people can pronounce my name backwards)

And now to the part of my name which have given me a heartache for all my life that even my Malaysian peeps have a hard time with...

1. Z (now thats plain lazy, a really bad variation of my name TZE, its the American sound by the way)
2. Zed (Sound alied)
3. Zoo ( Haha my Polish accent lecturer called me that once)
4. Tee ( And people ask me why I hate golf, pronounce the "Z" people!)
5. See ( At least it not that bad..)

Now you see why it can be annoyingly funny at times when I say my full name. Thank god for my Christian name and the nickname that I have been using all this years.

1. Daniel
2. DJLIM
3. DJ

But no worries I have learn to respond to nearly all the weird sounding names mentioned above but do not I repeat do not ever call me especially in public LAMB. Haha!

* The writer lives in an imperfect world where names can't be pronounce properly. =)

Chartered Accountant Student Challenge 2009 (Personal Update)  

Posted by DJLIM

Heya! It was whirl wind journey for me today especially in regards to my teams submission for the Chartered Accountant Student Challenge 2009. Even I gotta admit that the overwhelming response in the votes was way beyond my expectations more so since the entire team are just plain old wet behind the ears first year students and would like to give a big thank you to all those who have found my report an interesting read and voted for it as well. a big thank you to all of you.

Also if anyone of you are still interested in reading my report and contemplating in voting it as well just head to my team profile , E-Star Solutions and vote for my team if you think we deserve it. Pheww its only the first day and we have reach 100+ votes for it and once again a big thank you to all of you that voted for my report.

Thanks again and feel free to check out the link.

The shock of the new  

Posted by DJLIM

A worthwhile article by a professor at my uni especially for future first year university students.

Q. I am so shocked by how hard uni is. The lectures are impossible to understand. I can't find anyone to help me. I was top of my class at school and now I am so completely lost.

A. There are probably at least two reasons why you are feeling the way you describe.

The first is that things are different. You are now in a new situation, different to the one you are accustomed to at school and one that requires a different set of independent learning skills.

The second is that things are the same, in a sense. You are now in a situation where you are among peers. You were top of the class at school because you're bright and you work hard. But everyone at uni is similar to you - they're all bright and (most of them) work hard - so you are no longer different.

Fortunately, with a bit of guidance, time and perseverance you will be able to navigate uni a little better and these feelings will pass.

Lectures are probably quite a different experience to the smaller classes you enjoyed at high school. There is almost certainly less interaction between you and the lecturer than you have been accustomed to at school and you may feel just part of the crowd in a large lecture theatre where no one knows your name. While this feeling may not be familiar to you, it is common among first-year students.

Each lecture should have a theme or topic and should aim to make you understand several key points. See if you can listen for the three or four main points and make and review notes in relation to these. Make use of available supporting materials such as copies of powerpoint presentations, recordings of the lecture and so on. These can often help you piece together the main points and review them.

The subject or unit outline might also be helpful. This usually contains the learning objectives of the subject or unit. These may be helpful in determining what the main points or message from each lecture are and how they fit into the overall whole.

The free academic skills, language and learning advisory service offered by your university may help you with note-taking and about making sense of your subject or unit. Check your uni's intranet for contact details.

Once you have made all these efforts, you are more likely to follow what is happening in lectures. If not, it would then be appropriate to ask your lecturer or tutor for clarification about particular points or for suggestions about how to better understand the material.

My advice would be to hang in there and things will begin to feel less shocking and different.

Dr Marcia Devlin is a registered psychologist and professor of higher education research at Deakin University. www.deakin.edu.au/~mdevlin

Sigh should I take it?  

Posted by DJLIM

Sigh reflecting on my life I am now approaching another crossroad.

Not sure why but I am beginning to see my future is looking less and less likely to be in Malaysia.

In about a couple of months or so I will be eligible to burn my little red book that ties me back to my country of birth for a blue one that will bind me to a new country.

Wondering whether taking up the mantle of being a citizen of Australia could be a big mistake or an opportunity of a lifetime.

Either way a little part of me will be lost along the way.

Sigh wondering whether should I take it.

Or cling on to hope that something else will come along and make the decision for me.


Sigh should i take it?

More important what you study, not where you study  

Posted by DJLIM

Reading this article More important what you study, not where you study remind of the what I went through early this year when I talk to to other people and told them which university I went to.

Ever met obnoxious kids and even more annoying people that came up to you and ask you about which university your currently studying and then you tell them but you get replies such as

"What uni is that"
"Why go there? You not smart enough eh?"
"Not famous at all"
"Not a group of eight uni (G8), must be a useless institution"

Well thankfully I hardly ever get any of those but sometimes I do meet such obnoxious and arrogant people (usually some rich arrogant internationals) who act all high and mighty just because they are going to a "prestigious uni". Well just because I CHOOSE my uni and course base on the course content which by the way I find that it suits me it does not mean anybody who do not go to more "famous" universities are intellectually challenge students.

Lets face it in our pursuit of higher tertiary education many people often chose an institution base solely on the name or how famous a uni is without even once considering whether the institution they chose SUITS them.

Publicity campaigns often seduce students that G8 universities are superior due to the fact they are in a really nifty naming group such as the G8. Little that they know that the Group of Eight was just a group created to compete for additional research funding for their respective institutions. which has very little to no affect on UNDERGRADUATE courses. This in no way that I belittling all my friends/acquaintances/people that I know off (on the contrary I deeply respect them) that go to such institutions but just wanted to enlighten the arrogant few who actually believe that going to a G8 uni makes them intellectually and genetically superior to students from other universities.

Their brain is wired to a false fact that Big Name Uni = High paying career, which if you read the article above is NOT true. They must realize no matter what uni they went to it is what they LEARN that matters. Gaining knowledge is THE most important aspect of university life no matter which uni you go to. People must realize that the ranking/reputation of an institution means nothing if you were a bloody arrogant idiot who scrape through uni or even worse failing!

In conclusion I am a firm believer no matter what you plan to do in life from university to TAFE to apprenticeship, always keep in mind that learning the skills needed to make oneself more employable and an all round good human being is THE most essential and precious thing one can get in their life.

Remember WHAT you learn is more important then WHERE you learn it from.

So what?  

Posted by DJLIM

I was recently amuse after reading this article BN leaders: Crisis proves PKR and Pakatan are incapable due to fact I do not see what is this so call hoo hah of a crisis. As far as most people are concern a resignation is just that a RESIGNATION!

Umno vice-president Tan Sri Muhyiddin Yassin said it showed that PKR and Pakatan Rakyat were incapable of administering a government.

So what?!?! Considering the circumstances PR are doing quite well. Despite the setbacks of the current economic crisis (which by the way B-End kept on having some self denial issues about it), B-End scheming to topple legitimates government and overall inherent weakness in the Malaysian economy; PR have prove them self as capable or more so than B-End when it comes to administering a government. From trying to get foreign investment to invest in their states to helping clean out the administrative mess left behind by B-End, they have already prove their administrative capabilities.

Muhyiddin said it also showed that some of the leaders were not able to place the people’s interests above theirs and hoped that the public realized that the Opposition could not lead effectively.

So what?!?! What a f*cking statement. Virtually ALL B-End leaders can't even grasp the concept of serving the people. B-End idea of serving the public has always been B-End first, the public last. The big wigs in B-End have always enriched themselves ONLY and their smaller mindless fanatic members are to f*cking stupid to even question the will of their corrupted masters.

Umno vice-president Tan Sri Muhammad Muhammad Taib said Fairus’ resignation was an internal matter but “it shows that running a government is not easy.”
OMG who said anything about running a government is going to be easy! Like many things running a government is never easy! ESPECIALLY when an outsider (B-End) is pulling all the strings (MACC,Police,ISA etc) to topple governments form by PR. The Malaysian public know this and their anger for B-End is already boiling.

“They always criticise us, but when they have formed the government, they have problems in Penang, Perak and Selangor,” he said.

Well they did have to clean up the mess that B-END left behind (i.e. incompetent government system, destruction of important documents, internal sabotage etc) as well as B-End schemes to topple their states. So they are problems but the problems themselves were cause by the last government (B-End).

Penang Umno secretary and Opposition leader Datuk Azhar Ibrahim claimed that Mohammad Fairus had not performed the duties entrusted to him well and that it was best that he resigned. He alleged that Mohammad Fairus did not bring any development projects to the rural areas.

So what? if he is not doing a good job and resigns DUE to HIS OWN accord, all the better as he put the public first instead of the party unlike some idiot in Malacca that and a certain soon to be Prime Minister who would never step down despite the alleged corruption charges.

State deputy MCA chairman Eng Hiap Boon said Fairus’ resignation proved that Pakatan leaders did not have good leadership qualities.

On the contrary they prove they know their limts and are willing to acknowlege them which is a lot better than a lot of the babboons masquerading as people in B-End that can get away with inciting racial hatred,corruption and othe vices but CAN NEVER step down from their position of power.

“Pakatan Rakyat does not have what it takes to lead Penang. I have heard rumors that some of its leaders do not share similar directions with the top leadership,” he said.
So what! B-End and its members have been back stabbing and blaming each other ever since the last elections. If that is their idea of following the direction of their top leadership well I am better of with PR. (At least they have the gall to keep the public inform of their internal disputes instead of the silence and lies on the other side)


Foreword: Let me make me clear that I never support any party or leader blindly. If there people in B-End and PR who are corrupt and misusing their power or position just charge them and jail them. But if they start sabotaging states governments, destroying administrative documents, getting away with murder, f*cking up the economy, preaching holier than thou retarded statements and making life a living hell for ordinary Malaysians... I only have one thing to say to you..............


Melbourne Earthquake (Proper Update)  

Posted by DJLIM


Well by now most of Melbourne and Victoria has mange to wrap their heads around the fact an earthquake of about 4.6-4.7 on the Richter scale has hit Victoria. The strongest earthquake in a while. Base on the news the epicenter was Korumburra but with tremors felt as far as Belmont and of course my area (Glen Waverly) got a little shook up.

It was around 8.58pm when I started hearing my roof creak and groan like a dozen hungry possums were running on it and then a second later, my sofa and other areas around my house started rumbling,shaking and even dancing for about 5 seconds and boy it was a seriously 'EXCITING' 5 seconds of my life.

The revelation that it was an earthquake did not come to me until I went online and most of my friends said that they felt tremors as well, later news reports came up with reports on the tremors felt and the I just realize ........" I have no earthquake insurance".



Man after the devastating bush fires in February now Melbournians have to go a round with earthquakes in March! What April gonna bring? Floods,hails,tsunamis!?!?!?!

I just hope that the cracks in walls is all that there is to worry about this time in this city of extremes.

Earthqauke in Melbourne!!!  

Posted by DJLIM

After forest fires now about an hour ago Melbourne and other parts of Victoria felt tremors cause by an earthquake of the coast of South East Victoria! Also heard Tasmania also felt the tremors!

Damn it was kinda scary my sofa moved a little and the roof was well creaking!!

Lucky for me it last only for a few seconds.

Melbourne still a city of extremities!

Breaking news so far!
Earthquake shakes Melbourne suburbs (ABC)
USGS

30 Best Places......  

Posted by DJLIM

Went through a site called the Frisky today and came across this interesting article today and it was about the best 30 places to have sex and well I am not sure what is the criteria they use to label "the best" so I took the liberty to give my thoughts on each of the places mentioned!

So lets begin....

1. The zoo - Hell yeah!!! You just can't denie the 'Me Tarzan, You Jane' mentality can you. Just don't do it near underfed wolves,lions and other predators.

2. Behind a waterfall - Might seem romantic at first but if your place is seriously large waterfall like Niagra Falls your just asking for trouble, like getting crush by tons of water type trouble.

3. Work utility closet - Damn unless your talking about a janitor size office room the ones in houses are usually so small and cram......wait a minute I am beginning to see the merit in it. =p

4. Ladies Lounge At Radio City Music Hall - "Yawn"....boring....Zzzzzzz

5. In the woods - As long as its not in a rain forest....the leeches will suck you dry...

6. Police mobile unit - Hahaha sounds kinky!

7. Kitchen (counter, floor, restaurant, against the refrigerator) - Made famous by lots of Hollywood shows and has lost its magic sigh...is pretty much a standard thing now...

8. On your desk at work - Shhh... not when the boss is around....unless he/she is in to it hahahahaha!

9. Public transportation (bus, subway, taxi, water taxi, ferry, trolley) - As long as its not in a bus in Ipoh. God those are death traps waiting to happen.

10. On the floor - Another yawn fest...

11. 11. On a grand piano (a la Pretty Woman) - And I might High School Musical 2 gave little hints about this as well especially when Zac lied down on the piano and singing a threesome song "Na Na Na Na Na You Are The Music In Me" LMAO...

12. On a roof - Wow its like on the floor but higher up...

13. Playground (note: not when kids are around, please!) - Ahhhh nothing beats getting it down in brightly colored plastic wonderland...extra points if the playground in mention is at a McDonalds.

14. On a boat/dingy/catamaran - Definitely not especially if your in the middle of a sun burnt exposed ocean in shark infested waters..

15. Golf course at night - I prefer a mini golf course...

16. In a room with mirrors - Nuff said

17. In an airplane restroom - Damn no wonder half time the air plane restroom is 'OCCUPIED'

18. On the beach - NOT RECOMMENDED due to four words "Sand in your bum"

19. On a bear skin rug (bonus: in front of a roaring fire) - It is a must in snowy winter lodge hahahaha!

20. In a tent - Cheap,simple and kinky

21. In your childhood bedroom - with your childhood sweetheart/crush =P

22. In a body of water (river, lake, creek, ocean, puddle) - Once again as long as its not shark infested or piranha infested and more importantly not in a protected pristine marine waters, water pollution is abig problem still......Save the ocean people!!

23. On the hood of a car - you gotta wash your car before and AFTER...

24. In a department store dressing room - Ladies would love to have it in the perfume department...

25. In an elevator - Now how is that discrete...

26. On a staircase - Ouch the back pain...and a few broken ribs...

27. On top of the washing machine while it’s running - 'Facepalm'.... i can never look at my washing machine again....

28. Bar bathroom - Ewww ever been to bar bathroom, it stinks and full of hangovers 'leftovers'

29. In your parent’s bed - 'Shock'!!!!!! I am now mentality scarred......jumps over a bridge.....X_X

30. In a field at sunset (bonus: a corn field or on a barrel of hay) - Awww sounds so corny....reminds of the show "A farmers wants a wife"..

*The article above is meant to be humorous and is not meant to be offensive. And no the author is not a self proclaim sex guru. =P

The Day the Pacific Dried Up!  

Posted by DJLIM

The faces of the various people layoff in Melbourne due to Pacific Brands scaling
back its operations in Australia. Picture courtesy of SMH.com.au

Pacific brands the scion of the Australian textile industry and the maker of a dozen iconic Australian and global garment brands such as King Gee, Bonds, Holeproof, Playtex, Wrangler, Hard Yakka, Slazenger, Sheridan Sheets, Hush Puppies and Julius Marlow has virtually dried up overnight in the troubled economic seas of Australia.

Directly more than 1800 jobs have been disappeared and indirectly many more jobs that depends on Pacific Brand for its work such as textile contractors are all standing on knife age. It is really a sad day for the Australian textile industry and its workers. In this tough economic times many more jobs seem likely to disappear. I really feel sad for the dozen of workers that lost their jobs and hope that they will weather the current economic storm. Also at the same time I am now wondering how a company that claims to produce 100% Australian made garments can now claim to be Australian at all when their manufacturing base has move to Asia.

However despite the difficulties face by the Australian economy, we should all examine the root of the problem and by doing that we can just summaries the fact that the Australian textile industry is not that viable within the borders of Australia. The current economic slowdown clearly reveals that textile manufacturing in Australia just can't compete with cheaper countries in Asia.

The facts says it all:

1. Weaker dollar myth - Despite the current weakness in the Australian dollar that is touted has made its products 40% cheaper, it is still not as cheap if one compares it relatively to other similar products manufactured in Asia specifically China.

2. Operating Costs - Even right now manufacturers in China has become very competitive and many layoffs has occurred. Many factories in China has either shut down or working at less than half capacity. So seriously if all this is happening in a "cheap" region of China, what chance does Australia really have in this department.

3. Market Dominance - The Australian market for garments is heavily dominated by either large garment shops or the supermarkets themselves. This scenario of market dominance of Coles, Woolworths, Target, etc makes the distribution of textile products in Australia very narrow and to centralized. Without a large number of independent outlets selling and marketing Australian made textile products, the consumers will be force to head to the large chains for their shirts,socks,underwear and other garments, essentially making the market very uncompetitive. Also the notion of putting all our eggs in one basket comes to mind.

4. Atmosphere of No confidence - Right now the general consumer is living in an environment where they have no confidence in the state of the economy. This in turn forces them consciously to spend less and only on very essential items such as food. many are resorting to keeping their old garments during this time of economic uncertainty.

5. Cheaper imports - Once again the contentious issue of cheaper imports is contributing factor in the abysmal state of the Australian textile industry. Cheaper products from Aisa, Africa even South America are going to be a lot cheaper and in turn consumers around the world will be more incline to purchase such products. Tough economic times = buying cheaper products, who can really blame them?

The outlook for the Australian economy may not be as bleak as the rest of the world but lets face it its textile industry is. All I can do right now is hope and pray for the thousands of workers affected by this crisis and wish that the silver lining will show itself soon.

The article above is written by Daniel Lim and it is his reflection and opinion on the state of the Australian textile industry. The author takes no responsibility for any loss that results from the article above, after all this article is base on the opinion of a 1st year undergraduate commerce student who wrote this article base on his opinion and the reading of various articles around the internet.

Ramblings on the Economic Crsis: The Causes  

Posted by DJLIM

By now everybody has felt the financial repercussions of the economic slowdown has hit virtually every economy in the world. From the glorified companies on Wall Street to the financial capitals of Europe to the poor families on the streets. Everyone is facing hard and difficult times financially

In relation to this many of us are wondering how did this mess begin in the first place and more often then not the usual answer was GREED. Yes a human emotion of wants and needs is cited as THE cause for the crisis that we face today. A very simple answer for a very complicated problem which I still find it hard to believe or to even comprehend. After all it is very hard to comprehend how the vague concept of human greed can effect us all financially. However on a closer look on how greed affects the ACTIONS of individual's and companies, it is not such a far fetched idea after all. I do not claim to be an expert on how the the global economy work nor I claim that I am all knowing about the fundamental economic forces that govern the financial system of countries around the world. I however would like to give my two cents on what the green eye monster role in this mess.


1. Mortage lenders - Mortage lenders in the past and especially in the United States were being greedy and will willingly give out mortages to people that did not have the ability to pay back those loans that they use to pay for their property. To make thing worse the lenders charge high interest rates despite knowing that their clients can't pay for the loan consoling themselves with the fact if their clients can't pay for the loan they could just reposes the house or property. So basically the greed of mortage lenders lead to many people live in homes that they could never afford to live the first place and the seeds of the financial crisis were sown.


2. Complicated Financial Instruments - My uncle once jokingly said that in todays economic crsis is all caused to due to the MBA guys in Havard creating absurdly complicated fianancial instruments. He also add that finace industry today is a lot more mind bogling compared to the industry in 1980's etc. In a way it made a lot of sense, the "MBA guys in Havard" or any of the so call fiancial gurus, had been using complicated financial instruments base on speculative concept of paper money. After all at that time when they implement their financial acuemen during the years lead up to 2008, it seem that they were doing miracles. A $1000 investment can be easily turn in to $1 000 000 investment. All of this is done without any viable leverage. In affect when the first sign of an economic meltdown was spotted their mutimillion investments quickly evaporated back to their $1000 start up cost. Another case of greed in a fragile speculative environment.



3. Incompetent but greedy industry leaders - When the leaders of some of the biggest car companies in the US came to the senate to plead for a financial bailout for their precious car industry, they did it brazenly with personal jets and large private cars. That was just a glimpse of the greed that affects their woeful decision that lead up to the crisis. The culture of greed is not only limited to them as other such leaders from across all sectors and around the world are also at fault for falling to the green eye monster. After when CEO's are paid with multimillion dollars salaries we would expect some kind of results from them and not going to governments to ask for a bailout when they still maintain their culture of excessive of spending. Why should we reward people for failure?

In conclusion the causes stated above are all cause to the same underlying problem of greed or more specifically the actions cause by greed. The greed for money can be very addictive and dangerous indeed.

Ramblings on Teenage Pregnancy Part 2: Maternity Leave for KIDs!!!  

Posted by DJLIM


Weird isn't it that such a topic can ever come out in our lifetime. Pregnancy use to the realm of between two young adults,their medical practitioner ie. doctors,midwives,shamans,etc and their family. But with the advent of increase in teenage pregnancy where young girls and even younger boys becoming parents is well...DISTURBING!

Which brings me to the question that I saw being discuss on Dr Phil (man I love his shows) should maternity leave be given to school children?

Such a question has cause many people to feel uncomfortable with such a contentious issue. After all when you start hearing doctors,parents,priest,pastors,community advisers and teachers having different opinions on what initially seem like a very simple question, you know that this is one of those questions where there is no clearly drawn line between right and wrong. It will be very hard for any of us to say which is more important: the education of the young mother or the maternal bonds between a mother and a child.

Well my answer to this is a resounding 'YES' and here are my reasons:

1. Base on my knowledge on biology of pregnancy, a woman that has just given birth would often need some time to fully recover from pregnancy especially if it is their her first child and more so if the mother to be is too old or to young. After all a dilation of ten centimeters or more to me sounds incredible painful (I rather die man) despite what the medical doctors talk about how chemicals in the body such as estrogen help elevate the pain.

Excuse me as I take a moment to recover from my dizziness >_< style="font-weight: bold;">should be given by schools to young mothers and on the mother part thy must be willing to pick up the slack in school after giving birth.

However I would always advise other teenagers and younger kids to NEVER become pregnant at such a tender age, for heaven sakes they can't even support their child on their own yet! But once the deed is done the parents (now instant grandparents),the schools and the community should do their best to give their support,encouragement and love to the young parents. After all isn't that what all mother regardless of age should receive?

So if any of you guys have your own opinion on this issue leave a comment or feel free to discuss among yourselves! =)


The writing above is base on the opinion of the author and in no way should ever be use as replacement of the advise of doctors,shamans,witchdoctors or anybody involve in the industry of giving births!

Ramblings on Teenage Pregnancy: Part 1 "Getting it young"  

Posted by DJLIM


Finally as this will be a milestone 100th post I have decided I will blog about something that has intrigue me for a long time and that is the very issue of teenage pregnancy.

Such an issue has been around for a long time and lets face it it is recurring problem no matter where anybody are. We can accuse the decadence or Western countries to the vaunted belief of of the conservativeness of Asian values to the hypocrisy of the so call 'Islamic States' regarding their stance on this issue but we all must remember the fact that it is a problem that has long been ignored, despised and even misread by many people. It is time we try to get some perspective on this contentious issue as we may soon find there are many unforeseen problem that come with this.

So lets begin from the very start, 'getting it young'. Below is a news report about the various cases of teenage pregnancy.

A baby-faced 13-year-old British schoolboy has fathered a child with his 15-year-old girlfriend, making him one of the youngest parents ever in Britain, a report said on Friday.

Alfie Patten, whose voice has not yet broken, admitted he had not thought about how he and girlfriend Chantelle Steadman would support baby daughter Maisie Roxanne, as "I don't really get pocket money".

"When my mum found out, I thought I was going to get in trouble," said the teenager, pictured on the front page of the Sun tabloid with the baby, born in Eastbourne, southern England.

"We wanted to have the baby but were worried how people would react. I didn't know what it would be like to be a dad. I will be good, though, and care for it," he said.

But he admitted: "I didn't think about how we would afford it. I don't really get pocket money. My dad sometimes gives me STG10 ($A21.91)."

Alfie's dad Dennis, 45, said his son - who looks younger than his age and is just four feet (1.22 metres) tall - was fully committed to his new paternal role.

"He could have shrugged his shoulders and sat at home on his Playstation. But he has been at the hospital every day," he said.

The baby, who weighed in at seven pounds and three ounces (3.27kg) when she was born Monday, was conceived after just one night of unprotected sex, the paper said. Alfie was 12 years old at the time.

In theory, police could have brought a prosecution for under-age sex, but they said they would not be pressing charges.

"Sussex Police Child Protection Team were aware of a 14-year-old girl that had become pregnant as the result of a relationship with a 12-year-old boy," said a spokeswoman for Sussex Police.

"A joint agency investigation with East Sussex County Council Children's Services has taken place which has considered the needs of both individuals and there will be continued support for these two young people in the future."

Taken from the Brisbane times.
My first impression of this was well its not much a surprise is it. After all at that age most teenage boys and girls have been use to sexually oriented nature of today's society. Boys will be boys and will often be engrossed in the various heavily sensual content of of video games such as Grand theft Auto,God of War etc and for girls trends in magazines and by their favourite celebrities will be playing a very sub-conscious role in their psyche about how society perceive them and their bodies.

However it is in my opinion such third party or external influences is never enough to encourage a large majority to initiate copulation with opposite sex. It is often come down to plain sheer will power and education level (education as well as the wisdom) of the individual regarding such situations. How many times have the term 'in the heat of the moment' has been use by the dozens of instant overnight fathers and mothers around the world.

Lets face it no matter external sensual content is always just going to be just that external temptation it will be up to the individuals themselves to decide whether they want it or not. It does not matter what is one individual beliefs,religion or even personal moral beliefs, it will come down to the ability of the person to control their most primal instincts at a time when they are just discovering themselves.

A strong and caring family unit and circle of friends and mentors are really important in such times. As after all teenage pregnancy is a very contentious issue as it greatly affect's the health of the young mother,the mental health of the family involved and the financial pockets of many people. It will also lead to many other problems such as abortion, honour killing,abandonment of an infant and so on.

In my part two of Ramblings on teenage pregnancy i will write about my opinion on the SURPRISING issue {deep breath} on the question

Should Maternity Leave be given to school children?

Commerce isn't it mundane?  

Posted by DJLIM




This is a post which I had plan for a long time but never had the guts to do so. This was about a choice I made last year on why I decided to do a total turnaround on my degree choices and finally decide to pursue a degree in commerce. Its a decision I would come to question every time ever since I made that fateful decision and more importantly the question of doing commerce or more specifically accounting in university. I use to ask myself this question "Isn't it mundane". Well the answer i got for you is heck NO!!

Ever since I was little I always envisioned myself doing something on the science part of life. You know the traditional Asian prestige concept on being a doctor, dentist, scientist,etc. After all i had basically done science subjects my entire life,from toiling through PMR, to freaking out for SPM to finally ending at a climax when I did my VCE.

And it turns out I never did enjoy it. No its not the interesting fact and figures that do not interest me(Heck I read the entire encyclopedia collection about medicine from Reader Digest many times and loved it) but it is mostly the stuff people do before making the scientific gibberish accessible to common folks is what bores me. Also like all teenagers with a rebellious streak I once had this irrational mind to never follow in my father footsteps to become an accountant.

Fast forward to now I am on my first steps to become what my father was and forever shall be and I might add a very good one as well; an accountant.

It is now I begin to see the really "cool' side about commerce a degree or an accounting degree. Many people may not know it but the ancient (yes I said ancient) knowledge of accountancy date back when numbers were first discovered in ancient Mesopotamia. It was first use in the very simple calculations to record and ensure the numbers of sheep was done correctly. Then came along Luca Parcoli that finally made accountancy highly relevant.

Many people may say that crunching numbers everyday is hogwash and unimportant compared to the other more 'noble' professions such as medicine but have they really look at the real world and see how it functions.

Well if you did you will see accountants everywhere from large corporations to even hospitals, all of these organizations will need or at least require the services of an accountant. The role and function of good old number crunching is not only use as a mere book keeping but it is of vital importance in the planning,assessment and forecasting of product,services and performance of lots of organizations. From charities to hospitals to large corporations all of them require people with 'mad number crunching skills'. As long as commerce and trade is still a vital part of humanity culture accountants are going to be around for a long time.

Oh yeah, if you guys think that such people are the stereotypical men and women who lead boring and mundane lives well you are in for a big surprise. Heck many of them really do lead vibrant,exciting and colorful lives later in their career.

Now I do not feel so bad when people complain that having a degree in commerce is mundane,for in fact they have no idea what they are missing out on!

* The author is stoke that he is about to begin his degree at Deakin University for the Bachelor of Arts (International Studies)/Bachelor of Commerce. Hey I never did said I wanted to be fully like my dad hahaha! That's what the art degree is for!

Does this look like a mundane accountant to you?

The Challenge Begins!!!  

Posted by DJLIM

This year I am entering the Chartered Accountant Student Challenge which is open to all open for university students from 1st years to 5th years but more targeted for students in Commerce or business students.

For your information this challenge is basically encouraging uni students in groups of one to four to help solve a business problem regarding participating non-governmental organizations (NGO). Winners of the challenge will not only get the chance some really cool Apple Laptops or an iPhone THE main prize is a designer suit from Farage to wear to the Ultimate Power Lunch at Sydney's exclusive Level 41 restaurant. Here they will present their submission to the CEO of Cancer Council Australia and a selection of senior managers from Mars, Woolworths, Qantas and BT Financial Group as well as partners from the big 4 accounting firms. And to make the prize even sweeter the winner gets to be flow overseas to major business capitals around the world! London,new York,Shanghai you name it.

So in other words this is an actual real life business challenge for uni students and I am so psyched. Though I know most students that join this challenge are usually in their second,third or even honour year students,I just hope my first year team would really help me get through this. Challenges and obstacles are abound and my first blow cam sooner then expected as Esther (the only person that had uni accounting experience) can't enter due to a technical legality of needing to be over 18. Sigh however I am more then confident that I and my remaining team can pull out something out of this.

Then again all I am looking for is to gain some experience on what it takes to be accountant. =)

What the chinese really think of Zambry!  

Posted by DJLIM

This amusing picture says it all! =) After all what else can Perakians think about an illegitimate guy ruling a state!!

BN And PR spoilt brats that need to grow up!  

Posted by DJLIM

Just a few days ago when I had finally had the time to actually read some news online regarding my favorite country Malaysia, I was given the shock of my life when I read an article on Malaysia Today about some bullshit that Najib saying they will form the new government in Perak. I was appalled and shocked reading the title of the article and now feel sicken with the events enfolding in the Silver State. I even check on other sites and blogs hoping to hear that this was just a very ill conceived joke. sadly it is this turn into hopeless endeavor.

My first thoughts about this article WTF is is wrong with this idiots. I am sick of all this talk about defections from one party to another.Why can't the idiots get it right that any talk and actions regarding defections from either Pakatan Rakyat or Barisan Nasional would never go well with the people of Malaysia. I am now having the impression that the political leaders in Malaysia are all acting like small whining spoilt brats fighting over a half broken toy in the kindergarten playground.

Anwar and the rest of Pakatan Rakyat should never had resorted to to dirty underhanded tactics namely defections and giving promises that they were not able to deliver that were use by BN many times as lets face it the bastards and con artists in BN have perfected their disgusting art for many years. PR should have taken the most logical action when they won they did the impossible in the 2008 General Elections by getting their house in order and finally show all Malaysians that there is finally a true alternative (not as if BN has been ever been an ideal party EVER).

The people at BN should also begin to actually take a hard look at themselves to see the failures that they have become. The temporary relief they get in Perak is just plainly the final grave they are digging by themselves. Any result in Perak that climax with BN coming to power will finally push Malaysia to the brink. BN can now never hope to maintain power come next elections. No matter what Najib says about who started the defection game, the fact is PR still holds the popular support and the moral high ground (no matter how small that is). BN has made many mistakes in the past but this is going to be their biggest disaster ever in their sad unispiring history.

Both parties should and must reevaluate their standing and principles as fast as possible or Malaysia is now f*ucked up.

I just want to say to all the political leaders in Malaysia grow up you stupid spoilt bastards!

New Deal prolonged the Great Depression  

Posted by DJLIM

I recently read an interesting articles regarding the The New Deal. it gave me an interesting and deeper understanding about the Economic plan by Roosevelt that had unintended consequences on the worlds economy and how it relates o the current economic downturn face by us today and the parallels that President Obama faces with his own plan. Mind you the articles is long but if you can get bear it and get through it ,you'll be surprise how interesting the notion of a highly regarded and lauded plan may have done the opposite in what it was suppose to do.



THE New Deal is widely perceived to have ended the Great Depression. This has led many to support a "new" New Deal to address the current crisis. But the facts do not support the perception that Franklin Delano Roosevelt's policies shortened the Depression, or that similar policies will pull our nation out of its economic downturn.

The goal of the New Deal was to get Americans back to work. But the New Deal didn't restore employment. In fact, there was even less work on average during the New Deal than before FDR took office. Total hours worked per adult, including government employees, were 18 per cent below their 1929 level between 1930-32, but were 23 per cent lower on average during the New Deal (1933-39).

And it wasn't just work that remained scarce during the New Deal. Per capita consumption did not recover, remaining 25 per cent below its trend level throughout the New Deal, and per-capita non-residential investment averaged about 60 per cent below trend. The Great Depression clearly continued long after FDR took office.

Why wasn't the Depression followed by a vigorous recovery, like every other cycle? It should have been. Productivity grew rapidly after 1933, prices were stable, real interest rates were low and liquidity was plentiful. We calculated on the basis of just productivity growth that employment and investment should have been back to normal levels by 1936. Nobel Laureate Robert Lucas and Leonard Rapping calculated on the basis of just expansionary Federal Reserve policy that the economy should have been back to normal by 1935.

So what stopped a blockbuster recovery from starting? The New Deal. Some New Deal policies certainly benefited the economy by establishing a basic social safety net with social security and unemployment benefits, and by stabilising the financial system through deposit insurance and the Securities Exchange Commission. But others violated the most basic economic principles by suppressing competition, and setting prices and wages in many sectors well above their normal levels. These anti-market policies choked off powerful recovery forces that would have plausibly returned the economy back to trend by the mid-1930s.

The most damaging policies were those at the heart of the recovery plan, including the National Industrial Recovery Act, which tossed aside the nation's anti-trust acts and permitted industries to collusively raise prices provided they shared their newfound monopoly rents with workers by substantially raising wages well above underlying productivity growth. The NIRA covered more than 500 industries, ranging from automobile and steel, to ladies hosiery and poultry production. Each industry created a code of "fair competition" which spelled out what producers could and could not do, and which were designed to eliminate "excessive competition" that FDR believed to be the source of the Depression.

These codes distorted the economy by artificially raising wages and prices, restricting output and reducing productive capacity by placing quotas on industry investment in new plants and equipment. Following government approval of each industry code, industry prices and wages increased substantially, while prices and wages in sectors that weren't covered by the NIRA, such as agriculture, did not.

Manufacturing wages were as much as 25 per cent above the level that would have prevailed without the New Deal. And while the artificially high wages benefited the few that were fortunate to have a job in those industries, they significantly depressed production and employment, as the growth in wage costs far exceeded productivity growth.

These policies continued even after the NIRA was declared unconstitutional in 1935. There was no anti-trust activity after the NIRA, despite overwhelming evidence of price-fixing and production limits in many industries, and the National Labor Relations Act of 1935 gave unions substantial collective-bargaining power. While not permitted under federal law, the sit-down strike, was tolerated by governors in a number of states and was used with great success against major employers, including General Motors in 1937.

The downturn of 1937-38 was preceded by large wage hikes following the Supreme Court's 1937 decision that upheld the constitutionality of the National Labor Relations Act. These wage hikes led to further job loss, particularly in manufacturing. The "recession in a depression" thus was not the result of a reversal of New Deal policies, as argued by some, but rather a deepening of New Deal policies that raised wages even further above their competitive levels. Indeed, New Deal labor and industrial policies prolonged the Depression by seven years.

By the late 1930s, New Deal policies began to reverse, which coincided with the beginning of the recovery. In a 1938 speech, FDR acknowledged that the American economy had become a "concealed cartel system like Europe", which led the Justice Department to reinitiate anti-trust prosecution. And union bargaining power was significantly reduced, first by the Supreme Court's ruling that the sit-down strike was illegal, and during World War II by the National War Labor Board, which limited large union wage settlements to cost-of-living increases. The wartime economic boom reflected not only the enormous resource drain of military spending, but the erosion of New Deal labor and industrial policies.

By 1947, through a combination of war-time wage restrictions and rapid productivity growth, the large gap between manufacturing wages and productivity had nearly been eliminated. Since then, wages have never been so distorted, nor has the country suffered such abysmally low employment.

The main lesson from the New Deal is that wholesale government intervention can - and does - deliver the most unintended of consequences. This was true in the 1930s, when artificially high wages and prices kept us depressed for more than a decade; it was true in the 1970s when price controls were used to combat inflation but only produced shortages. It is true today, when poorly designed regulation produced a banking system that took on too much risk.

President Obama and Congress have a great opportunity to produce reforms that return Americans to work and provide a foundation for sustained economic growth. These reforms should include specific plans that update banking regulations and address a manufacturing sector in which several large industries - including automobile and steel - are no longer internationally competitive. Tax reform that broadens rather than narrows the tax base and that increases incentives to work, save and invest is also needed.

We must also confront an education system that fails many of its constituents. A large fiscal stimulus plan that doesn't directly address the specific impediments our economy faces is unlikely to achieve either the country's short-term or long-term goals.

Harold L. Cole is professor of economics at the University of Pennsylvania. Lee E. Ohanian is professor of economics and director of the Ettinger Family Program in Macroeconomic Research at UCLA.
Story

A Summer Uni Enrollment  

Posted by DJLIM

I had recently went to enrolled at Deakin University for my course and for all intent purposes it was a really blistering, excruciating, exhausting, perspiring, and very uncomfortable day. After all it was around 1.00pm went I head off to Deakin under a shocking 42 degree Celsius temperature. It was not my kind of day and it did not really help as I got lost momentarily in this surprisingly large 27ha+ campus. And like most people asking directions was a main priority. It was then I regretted NOT attending the university numerous open days and information sessions before hand. But it was a minor inconvenience.

Registering was fairly simple process and the staff was especially helpful and very friendly, especially a lady by the named of Joanna who I believe was career adviser.

The only snag was when it came to choosing my units for my first year which turn out to be more complicated then I thought. It is not that I had no inkling of what units to do (Accountant with CA recognition) but was the actual versatility on offer. The great advantage of doing a double degree can also be a drawback which its versatility because with the great flexibility to choose the units we also have an enormous responsibility to plan our courses ourselves.

However all in all it was a really cool day, well except for the hellish temperature and mange to meet some new friends as well though I now wish my student card look a lot better! (damn why must the lady take my picture without allowing me time to get ready!)

Sigh the hot temperature is killing me right now....

Gran Torino !  

Posted by DJLIM



Every now and then movie that does not depends on special effects and fantasy like settings to grab my attention blows my mind away and one of those movies I seen so far that fits that description is Gran Torino.

Starring Clint Eastwood from Dirty Harry and numerous other western pictures fame really brings to life the story of change and redemption in a relatively small and quite town in America. What this movie really excels in is the ability to be funny,poignant,exciting,melancholic and ultimately heartbreaking all in space less then two hours.

The movies does have some flaws but all in all the strength and depth of story itself makes this movie as one of the best movies I had seen in a long time . And that says a lot for a person growing up in an age where special effects and fantastical settings are needed to grab the attention of viewers like us today.

I give this movie a solid rating 9/10.

Clint Eastwood as Wait still showing how badass his character is!



Sue helping Walt (Eastwood) to not only get to know the family but also help himself to some 'Gook' food.



A really 'insightful' bonding session about a girl Walt named 'yum yum. Hahaha!



Walt and his 'Padre' before going of to (spoilers) fateful showdown with the gangsters.

Happy Holidays!!!  

Posted by DJLIM

As Chinese New Year and Australia day coincides at around the same time this year I just want to wish everybody

zwani.com<br


and Happy Australia Day as well!!!

University here I come!  

Posted by DJLIM

After waiting agonizingly like an idiot for my clock to reach 6.30 pm today I finally knew what university I got into and drum roll please.......I got into...........................................................................
Deakin University!



Yup I am actually quite satisfied with what I got heck I will be doing Bachelor of Arts(International studies)/ Bachelor of commerce! A double degree which I am seriously ecstatic after all I get to have internship with an overseas organization during penultimate year!! I can see it now Paris here I come! Hahahaha!( Though I can imagine it will be some place more mundane).

Yes world I am finally or going to be a formal undergraduate student!!! Heres my online offer!


Ok that's all time to prepare myself for a challenging year! Seeya!

Flabbergasted !!!  

Posted by DJLIM

Today I went online and was flabbergasted !!!

Why you ask?
Just realize that the tertiary placement offers through VTAC is going to be release tomorrow on the

freaking 19th of January

, 6.30 pm one full day before 20th!!! My mind is racing right now as the words "Oh my Gawd" keeps on repeating it self in my brain like a broken old record player!

I feel so screwed right now....looks I am going to have a beer in one hand and a gun in another ....depending on the result I am going to use one of them! God I so hate university applications.....(crosses fingers, killed a rabbit for its lucky foot,praying like crazy and undergoing a strange mystic occult ritual) X_X

I am officially having a severe depressing nervous breakdown....

January 20th  

Posted by DJLIM


The date 20th of January is coming and it is a really

significant day for me! Not only is the eyes of the entire world going to be fixed

on the Presidential Inauguration of Barrack Obama, which by the way it is also

coincidentally touted as one of the most expensive Inauguration events in US

presidential history it is going to be a significant event and will be one for the

history books!







On a more personal level it is also going be the day when

the first round university offers are going to be release in Victoria for 2009! I

seriously can't wait! Though I am going to be nervous wondering what university and

which course or courses I will be accepted. I just hope i will get my first

preference and if worse come to worse I can always wait for the second round offers.

Damn the wait is killing me! Wish me luck!



The Best Job InThe World?!?!  

Posted by DJLIM


How would you like to be caretaker





to this





And get this you will receive a salary of A$150,000 ($103,000, £70,000) for six monthsand get to live rent-free in a three-bedroom villa, complete with pool for only 12 hours a month! Some of the duties included are feeding fishes and collecting mail (wow sounds cushy).



Well recently tourism officials has recently had just did that and the best part is the only qualification you need is.....

there is NONE



so if you guys seriously want the job just sent an online video application before February 22. And oh yeah you better hurry thousand of applicants from around the world has applied already! Just google Tourism Australia Queensland!

Why does the Malaysian Education System Suck So Bad?  

Posted by DJLIM

This is an article which I had plan to write a long time coming but I had not really had the time to think this through due to the fact the morons in the ministry it so badly and are delusional about its effectiveness! Heck even most of the minister children in power are placed in in schools that uses everything (from international schools to being overseas) but its own locally made jaguh kampung system. As a result I would like to delve in to that stupid issue later.

So allow me to begin to begin with a few aspects about the education system that I believe should either be do away and be completely purge from the system.

At number 1To many freaking subjects
- It seems the morons in the ministry have this twisted and sickening idea that increasing the number of COMPULSORY
subjects is a way to gauge the intelligence of students of the system. It can be seen very clearly as an average student in Malaysia face an increasing overload of subjects as he or she progresses from Primary 1 to Form 5. This is incredible ridiculous because by the time he or she reach to their SPM level they are now face with taking a a scandalous amount of about 10 to 21 subjects (yeah I know they had recently put a cap of 12 subjects but seriously that is still a stupid amount). As a result
we have a whole generation of students not only burden with lots of subjects they are also burden with pressures of peer peer prejudice favoring a certain subject over another.

2ndly
- WTF is with the irrelevant subjects.
With this the first that comes to mind is why the heck there is a subject called Pendidikan Moral/Moral Education? Its more like like 'Lets memorize some stupid irrelevant moral values word by word which by the way does not make sense as moral values are SUBJECTIVE!!!' subject. The only reason I can think about why they have to implement thsi subject because they have to help the non-Muslims waste their time (and Grey matter) while their Muslim friends/brethren learn about their religion. Other subjects that comes to mind are subjects like history (though if they did it right it can be one of the most worthwhile and fulfilling subjects) but right now it plainly sucks.

3rdly
-The content within the subjects.
This has been nagging me for a long time is the content in some subjects. Moral is one of them with the entire syllabus is stupid. History is filled with lots propaganda shit and subjects like living skills/kemahiran hidup does not really help at all. Even subjects that is suppose to in depth and relevant has a shockingly shallow content. Its not only superficial but the tendency for teachers to follow the textbook content strictly does not help matters. Subjects like English and even Malay has a very narrow minded syllabus and or intent purposes boring.

4th
Ever changing policy changes.
The people in charge of the Education Ministry have a very short sighted and short term memory in their decision making about how they should educate the public. They keep on changing policies that often seem out of date or it was seemed to be made by people who is out of touch of the system. Which all of this goes back to ministers children. It is mind boggling to me how they can suggest and implement measures that affects everyday normal school going Malaysian when their children does not follow system at all! If only they had the balls to walk the walk and actually trust in the system that they had perpetuated while having a mental breakdown would they then realize the the fallacy of their policies. How would they feel if their children comes home after school and have a following conversation as follows:

Minister :Hello son how was your day?

Son: It was a really crappy day, half of the teachers are having some kind of meeting in some far of place, my maths English teacher has just walk out o the classroom due to can't take the stress,my PE teacher was spewing stuff about having PE in the classroom but at least I have NO homework again.

Minister: What again it has been almost an entire year and your SPM is next week,how are you going to prepare for it!

Son: Duh! That is what tuition is for! School is just for playing and sleeping.

Minister: Oh my [censored] goodness! (faints)


See if only they would actually force their children to endure the education system that they had made then and only then they would actually strive to make it better.

DISCLAIMER: . The author reminds that this post is purely of the author’s sincere opinion. No intention of defaming or offending is intended. As such, the author requests that readers keep an open and rational mind while reading this post.

Lee 's law How Singapore Crushes Dissent  

Posted by DJLIM


As some of you might know I am avid fan of books about history and politics especially concerning the Asia Pacific most notably regarding the Malayan Archipelago. Books like The Malay Dilemma and The Singapore Story are counted as one of my most favorite books of all time. More often it is not the political ideas that makes me want to read such things but more of the story and experiences behind the story. So when I found the book Lee's Law How Singapore Crushes Dissent from the Monash Public Library I immediately went and borrowed it and boy was it a great read and it was the first time I was actually nearly brought to tears by a book. Why you may ask, the book is essentially a mans struggle as an opposition leader in Singapore who had campaigned and experience hardships and struggles against the People Action Party (PAP)and lost everything in the process.

I am of course talking about the late JB Jayaretnam. The book recounts his life and from his childhood to fall of his political office in Singapore. It essntially recounts how he had rise from the countless defamation suits and kiasu mentality of the PAP especially from his old political rival Lee Kuan Yew. Though I had always admired and greatly respect the Lee Kuan Yew, he like many of us had an Achilles Heel or a flaw which in his case was his stubborn mentality against criticism especially from the opposition.

As I read through the book I was impress with with Jayaretnam never say die attitude despite the difficult odds and obstacles as an opposition leader in Singapore. His every word has to be scrutinized to prevent the ruling government of Singapore from launching libel suits against him. Which in this case was often very successful and Jayaretnam was declared bankrupt on multiple occasions. But for some reasons he had always tried to keep on fighting for democracy which he strongly believes Singapore deserve. It is this endeavor that made this story both poignant and inspiring for person such as myself. The story itself should serve as an inspiration to all who are often face with difficulties so that they can strive to preserve their ideals and aspirations.

All in all it was a great read as it gave me a glimpse of the nation Singapore that it is today. A very successful nation in terms material wealth but is plagued with the issues of elitism,wealth gap and a kiasu mentality to boot. It makes me wonder what would Singapore do to finally become a true democratic nation (so that is success can continue) and not just and over glorified municipal council, albeit a very successful one.

Conclusion: A MUST READ. 9/10 (Its nearly in my eyes perfect expect for the bitter sweet ending.)

DISCLAIMER: . The author reminds that this post is purely of the author’s sincere opinion. No intention of defaming or offending is intended. As such, the author requests that readers keep an open and rational mind while reading this post.
PS Recently started archiving and cataloging all my posts to make it easier to find and read. Hope its makes it easier now. ^_^

A Tale OF Two Cows  

Posted by DJLIM

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM. You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION. You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when the cow drops dead.

A FRENCH CORPORATION. You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION. You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create clever cow cartoon images called 'Cowkimon' and market them worldwide.

A GERMAN CORPORATION. You have two cows. You reengineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

A BRITISH CORPORATION. You have two cows. Both are mad.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION. You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You break for lunch.

A SWISS CORPORATION. You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them.

A CHINESE CORPORATION. You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment and high bovine productivity. You have the newsman who reported on the numbers arrested.

AN INDIAN CORPORATION. You have two cows. You worship them.

A MALAYSIAN CORPORATION. You have two cows. You signed a 40-year contract to supply milk at 0.06 per lit. Then midway you raised the price to 0.60 or you cut supply. When the buyer agrees to the new price, you change your mind again and now want 1.20. The buyer decided you can keep the milk and they go look for milk that comes from recycled cows. Your two cows retire together with the PM.